About Me

Since I seem to have taken over writing for this blog, because Vanderdecken's eyes hurt whenever he looks at a computer, I had better tell you a bit about myself. I'm really only writing this because Vander suggested I take some time off from endlessly trying to hack into the Chinese government. And so, I'm going to tell you about myself, and see if it helps.

• My name is Ben Simmons. I share my last name with the infamous Bob Simmons, but don't confuse us with each other.
• I am 14 years old
• I live with my grandparents, since my real parents died when I was 10. I'm an only child.
• If you're wondering why I'm "not in school", saving the world is more important. And besides, I'm already ahead on all my classes at least a year (except English)
• I am a computer hacker (VD12 calls me a genius, but that's up to you to decide)
• I know some stuff about physics, and math formulas
• The two most recent points probably qualify me as somewhat geeky. But it's something I'm good at, and that's important to me because...
• I'm pretty much comfortable in my comfort zone. I know a lot of people say you should "get out of your comfort zone", but they never really give good reasons. If something works for you, you should try really hard to stay there, because, well, I mean, it's kind of obvious that it works.

Now for the more factual facts...

• I am not the best speller in the world. If you think my recent posts are pretty good, that's because of this extremely convenient thing we call "spell check". As for grammar, I use a "grammar check" that I programmed myself a few years ago. It took me weeks to do it, but now you know. So now that I've gotten that over with.
• I use an Dell laptop. It's pretty sweet, and if you're wondering how well it runs, let's just say, based on my 'adjustments', that it's better than anything anybody's gonna invent for at least half a decade (that's why Vandy calls me a genius)
• This, of course, means I'm not a Mac. Nothing against them, but it always bugged me that their "return" key is never used to "return" anywhere, but, rather, to go places. As opposed to the PC's "enter" key, which actually does what it says. They also have a "delete" key that works as a backspace, and, oh yeah, they're just now releasing mice that have "right click". If you have a Mac, please don't boycot the blog, I'm just saying...well, you're weird. Vander is a bit more tolerant, but I can't stand 'em.

And for my accomplishments...

• When I was four, I managed to run a programming adding "2 + 2", because I didn't want to bother adding them every time somebody asked me.
• I hacked into my mom's email account back when they still used DOS (that was before I was allowed to have my own email).
• I passed myself off as computer-science professor on a forum when I was ten.
• I once saved the US Federal Government $5 million dollars by stopping an undetected financial scam when one of my scanners detected that it was all going to a a state called Delecalidakidanois which was supposedly bordering Mexico, Canada, and Russia.
• I was, to quote VD12, "vital to the success in finding the cookie."

So, yeah, that's me. What was I worrying about exactly? Hmm, I guess it worked. Oh wait, hacking into China before Thanksgiving to save the entire city of Beijing from a futuristic bomb while worrying about a time-traveler from the past who knows more about the future than any of us, and seems to be keeping a big secret, while struggling to recover from the fact that Vanderdecken12 could die any moment...phew. I mean, the average 14 year-old could complain about having to ride in the back of a car for 10 hours straight and having to eat Chinese food every night. Why can't I just be average? Why can't I just go back to sitting on my bed in my pajamas, helping out when I can, but letting the rest of the world to do the hard stuff? That's my life. Can I have it back now?