Operation Alchemy

If you want to know why we picked that as a code name, the answer is rather straight forward. Alchemy was done during the Middle Ages in an attempt to make gold out of some cheap metal such as lead. It was not attempted using any sort of scientific method, however. It was, basically, "guess and check", much like our little operation, except ours was "guess and hope". The plane landed this morning (around 5 PM for you guys). At 6:30 AM, exactly 30 minutes before we were to leave, I asked to use the bathroom. But first, let me tell you a bit about the place where we were being held.

It was a simple, one-story building, somewhat resembling a floor-outline of a hotel. There is a series of rooms along the edges, and each one is completely excluded from the next. Inside this box of rooms is a wide hallway. The rooms are not nearly as uniform as hotel rooms, however, with some jutting out considerably into the hallway, and some jutting out in only some parts, making it into a rather eery, something's-gonna-pop-out-behind-the-corner hallway. There is only one thing inside that hallway, and that is the ten foot by ten foot cell that they have been keeping us in. All the doors lock electronically, including the entrance. That sounds harsh, I know, but it is not uncomfortable. Sure, guards line the hallways, but it is normally quite comfertable, and the guards have been very nice. I could have stayed there for quite some time, if I didn't have a giant cookie to destroy. Oh yeah, the door. The one and only door out of this building was in the northernmost section of the building. The only other way out was through vents which a LEGO person couldn't fit through in a million years.

Now back to the story. The bathroom is in one of the outer-most rooms, and the guard who was to take us across the Atlantic didn't want to have to stop in the middle of the ocean for a restroom break, so he obliged. Aleck opted not to use the bathroom, all part of our plan. Then he, being as quick as he is, a secret agent and all, stealthily snatched the guard's radio communicator and his keys . The guard almost noticed, so I, trying to be as quick as I am, being a secret agent, though extremely new at it, bent over as if to throw up. The guard happened to be wearing his best shoes, so he took notice of that immediately. As soon as he appeared to have forgotten the sudden lightness of the key ring and radio-holder, I "recovered."

"What was that? You Ok?"

"Just...sea sickness."

"But we're not on a boat!"

"Yes...well, my stomach must have forgotten." Aleck slipped the radio into my back pocket (yes, LEGO people have back pockets). Our walk toward the bathroom was uneventful. Until, that is, the last ten seconds. I shoved the guard unexpectedly into one of the outside rooms and then yelled "Ben, now!" into the radio. The door closed and locked automatically.

"You looked surprised on the security cameras I just disabled," Ben's voice came over the radio, "didn't think I could do it?"

"You're a genius, Ben."

"I try to be," he said slyly, in a way that soundeda lot more like the innocent kid he was than the evil hacker he pretended to be.

I went into the bathroom and unscrewed the vent that was on the ceiling so that one side of the filter hung down, swinging gently from the draft. And, knowing very well I couldn't fit, left the restroom and headed toward the south of the building, away from the exit. That's when a voice came over the building's loud speaker, "Both prisoners have escaped. Repeat, both prisoners have escaped. They are heading toward the south of the building." I heard the guards throwing open doors trying to find us. I ducked into the southernmost room and caught my breathe.

There's nothing scarier than knowing there are about 15 armed guards outside the door, even if you have a plan. All fifteen, their entire force, approached my room.

"You ready?" Ben whispered through the radio.

"Yeah, your voice replicator ready?"

"Sure thing. Here they go." Then they banged down the doors, all of them pouring in. Ben flipped off the lights, and utter chaos ensued. I managed to weave my way around all of them in the dark, and headed toward the bathroom again. This time, however, all I did was throw the radio up into the vent and close the door again, continuing my run toward the entrance. Nobody was at the door, and I made my way toward the plane, parked nearby. Aleck was already inside.

"The plane's ready to go." Aleck said sternly.

"How'd you do?"

"The building is booby-trapped enough to last them 2.5 days."

"What happened to the pilot?"

"Another member of HUNGRY. We may never have made it to America alive."

"What's up with all the pilot traitors? You think the FAA is behind all this?"

"Doubtful. Bob Simmons probably just knows some friends."

The plane accelerated, heading, not towards Washington, but towards the bad guys. And as for all the people who could possibly chase us, well, thanks to Ben, they're still negotiating with a radio hiding in the bathroom that claims to have a machine gun, and isn't afraid to use it and thanks to Aleck, they're falling into some trap every step they take. We have a considerable head start. Now off to destroy that cookie...